[ She comes to a sudden stop when she sees the cake, the words on it jumping out at her like a highway robber. Her brain stutters; she peeks left and right as if there might be someone else in the house who could have arranged this for her. Slow Dancer, maybe.
But no, Dokja is definitely the only other person in the vicinity. A lump wells up in her throat without apparent reason, and she looks perhaps alarmingly more devastated than delighted. ]
Mr. Dokja... what is this?
[ As if she can't read the cake perfectly well on her own. ]
[ It's his embarrassment over the situation that keeps him from noticing the devastated look on Gray's face. Dokja's too busy glancing around at everything but her as he hurries over to the table to start clumsily fiddling with the lighter. It takes a few tries, but the flame eventually flickers on, and he awkwardly moves to start lighting the candles one by one.
Thankfully, there aren't that many to light. ]
Eustace mentioned your birthday before and he left something for you. [ Nods to the gift bag. ] I thought... it would be strange if I gave it to you without at least a small celebration.
[ When he looks up after lighting the last candle, he finally spots the expression on her face, and his own shifts into one of concern. ]
[ In a lot of ways, this feels cruel. That gift bag sitting there innocuously with its gifter nowhere to be seen is a reality too far. Dokja's act is undeniably one of kindness, and that too summons a well of feeling in her: that it's more than she deserves, that it's painfully sweet and ordinary of him.
She's never put much stock in her birthday. For a long time, it was a countdown to her inevitable death, and it drowned her in attention she desperately wished to avoid. Dokja's version of a birthday party is a lonely and pathetic affair in comparison, the number of candles on the cake not even close to correct, and she wouldn't have it any other way.
Regardless, she begins to cry. She's aware that it's not a very good response to an act intended to make her happy, so she tries to be quiet about it, but the fact sticks out that Eustace isn't here, Add isn't here, the latter having been with her for every birthday twelve years past. It feels wrong to celebrate anything with them gone.
She shakes her head, wipes at her eyes, and forges on valiantly. If she acts like she isn't crying, then maybe they can both pretend it isn't happening and she's just overcome with gratitude. And a small part of her is; this is far more than she would ever ask or expect of Dokja.
She sniffs. ]
I'm not five, Mr. Dokja...
[ She means for it to be a lighthearted comment, but the effect might be lost in light of the waterworks. ]
[ Imagine thinking that nothing would top having to awkwardly navigate a birthday celebration, only to get hit with crying right afterward. Dokja balks once he realizes what's happening, his posture stiffening as he stands there in tense silence because what else is he supposed to do? Not only is he piss poor at comforting others in the first place, but he imagines that any sort of comfort that comes from a practical stranger would be more uncomfortable than anything else.
And despite living together in this house, they are strangers to each other. The one single tie they had is no longer present, and in this moment, Dokja wishes more than ever that Eustace was here to be the person that Gray needs right now.
But he's not here, as painful a reminder as that is, so Dokja makes do. He's not sure why Gray's crying, but if her comment is anything to go by... ]
Sorry, [ he says hastily as he starts for the kitchen drawers. ] Maybe we have more candles somewhere? Ah, I thought... [ Actually. ] I wasn't really thinking about it?
[ It just seemed like a better idea than guessing wrong and ending up with a one or two candle difference, but maybe teenagers are more sensitive than he'd thought!! He hasn't been a teenager in a while so he wouldn't know. Oh God, the candle wax is starting to melt on the cake.]
[ Oh no... The power of politeness compels her to step over and hover her hands at his in an attempt to get him to stop, her more complicated feelings put on the backburner. ]
N-No. It's okay, you don't have to go that far.
[ She looks up at him with apology in her eyes. ]
I was just taken by surprise. I forgot it was my birthday. So, um... thank you.
[ She's trying to convey genuine gratitude, but again given her gloomy expression, something may be lost in translation.
And still the candles burn... ]
... It's been a long time since anyone gave me a birthday cake, so honestly I'm a little overwhelmed.
[ Well, he's effectively stopped in his tracks, the surprise flitting across his expression hard to miss as he looks down at her with the same concern from earlier. So it's like that, is it... ]
I guess we're more alike than I thought.
[ Considering that he, too, had forgotten his birthday a few months ago and was only made aware of it when his own companions, no longer present now, had thrown him a small celebration. It's embarrassing to think back on, especially because Dokja had practically bawled over it, but he thinks he can understand a little bit of what Gray's feeling in this moment.
He forces a smile on his face as he returns to the cake, sliding it across the table so it can sit closer to Gray. The candles are very quickly becoming nothing but globs of wax at this point. ]
I'll spare you my singing, and besides your gift, there are no more surprises after this, I promise.
[ It doesn't surprise her much that Dokja would forget his own birthday too; he doesn't seem like the type for the limelight.
But right, the candles. She doesn't put much stock in superstition, but in this moment she can't say no to the prospect of a free wish, however slim it is. She folds her hands in prayer — a habit she still practices before meals, even though she hasn't believed in God for a long time. She closes her eyes, brow knit in concentration.
It won't be a secret that she's wishing with all her heart that Eustace will miraculously show up on their doorstep in the near future, or at the very least that he's safe wherever he is. Even as the candles become precipitously short, she takes her time to pour her hope into this single wish.
Finally when she feels she's infused a proper amount of birthday power into the cake, she carefully blows the candles out. She's learned that symbolism can contain real magical power, so she can't take the process too lightly. With all that done, she looks to the gift waiting nearby. ]
[ Silence falls over both of them, with Dokja patiently waiting for Gray to make her wish. And while it isn't his own birthday, maybe he quietly wishes for the same thing in the somber lull of a celebration that feels anything but. Eustace should have been here too, Dokja thinks miserably, his gaze trained on the flicker of candlelight before he's snapped out of it by Gray's question.
He jerks his head up, then in the direction of the gift bag still sitting by the table, grabbing it to pass it over to Gray. It's heavier than it might appear, with tissue paper hastily shoved inside to mostly obscure its contents.
The gift itself, a knife (because that's a normal gift for a teenage girl), isn't wrapped, but she'll find a folded up letter on top of it, also written by Eustace and will require asking Val what it says. ]
I'll cut the cake in the meantime.
[ Both for an excuse for something to do, and to give Gray some space should she want to read the letter now. Don't mind him as he takes a short trip into the kitchen to grab something to cut the cake with, because it would be kind of fucked up to cut it with Eustace's present. ]
[ She gingerly takes the gift bag, a bit numb yet still nervous about what she might find inside. But first she opens the letter carefully, trying to preserve it as if damaging it would tarnish Eustace's intent. Directly from the fingers of Val it says:
Gray —
Happy birthday. You've been through a lot, most of it undeserved, but I'm grateful nonetheless you were brought into this world. It isn't much, but I hope this gift helps while Add is still missing.
If you ever need anything, all you need to do is call and I'll be there.
Eustace
She spends another minute looking at the letter and trying not to sniffle before she puts it away and moves on to the present itself. And what she finds is, not very cutely, a wholeass knife. It has a serious-looking curve to it, the blade pitch black in a way that makes her think it came from the earth, not any artificial treatment. It isn't the sort of knife she would have picked out for herself, but Eustace was much more of an expert than she is. So as always, she'll put her trust in him.
She observes it closely and gets the odd sensation that there's something more to it. She takes it in hand, makes it comfortable in her grip, and reaches for that vein of magical energy sticking out of it like wick...
... and then she disappears. She gasps and clutches the knife closer in surprise, and then holds it away again when she feets its unfamiliar length scraping at her clothes. But when she looks at the knife, when she looks down at herself, she sees nothing there at all. For all intents and purposes, she's invisible. ]
Um... Mr. Dokja?
[ Can he see her or is this an Emperor's New Clothes situation... (it isn't) ]
[ Damn, Eustace lying to the both of them. So much for being there.
Dokja isn't paying attention at all while he rummages inside of a drawer, so when he hears his name being called, he hums a distracted response before looking up.
... Uh. ]
Gray?
[ Forget the cake-cutting knife. Dokja takes a couple of steps back into the dining area, then pauses as he glances around with his expression scrunched up in confusion. Hadn't she just been here a second ago? ]
[ If he listens very closely, he may hear light footsteps as Gray approaches him, holding the knife way out of the way so that there are no accidental stabbings in this household today. She reaches her free hand out to carefully pat at him, mostly to show him where she is. ]
[ It takes a second for him to register the footsteps, and by the time Gray taps at him, he mostly figures it out. It still doesn't stop him from slightly jumping in surprise, one hand coming up to rest against his racing heart.
He's too old for jumpscares, but he looks in what he hopes is Gray's direction. ]
Geez, the least he could do is mention it would be magic. [ Typical Eustace, keeping too much to himself. ] Invisibility, huh? That's going to have its uses.
[ She cuts off as Raisin comes over and politely runs her over with his hugeness. In his doggy confusion, he rapidly sticks his nose all over her in a fury of sniffs. Able to smell and hear her but unable to see her, it seems he's making it a mission to suss out her deal. ]
[ It's kind of funny seeing Raisin searching for someone who is so obviously there, but also not. Dokja can't help the laugh that escapes him as he grabs hold of Raisin's collar to try and pull him away. ]
Down, boy.
[ Poor Raisin is a mass of drool and confused whines, and Dokja's gaze once again wanders in search of Gray's general direction. ]
[ That is a good question. She didn't want to just drop the knife and maybe lose track of it, but if she hits that mental switch again...
She pops back into the visible spectrum. She's sitting on the floor with the knife awkwardly held up in her hand and a splatter of dog drool on her. ]
... Yes, it looks like it.
[ She gets up and continues to hold the knife awkwardly because there's no sheath to go along with it and she's trying really hard not to accidentally stab anyone. ]
[ Oh! There she is, and Raisin boofs once in surprise, pulling himself free from Dokja's grasp to return to sniffing at Gray. His poor doggy brain isn't able to comprehend this.
Meanwhile, Dokja tilts his head to one side as he considers the knife in Gray's hand. ]
You want to cut it using Eustace's gift?
[ It's not going to turn the cake invisible, is it... ]
[ It's a little sad, the way Dokja says it, but it's a sentiment he genuinely wishes for but knows will never be the case. But with that said, he gestures back toward the cake on the table. ]
[ She nods and gets to cutting! For all that she's stupidly coordinated and proficient in all kinds of weaponry, she cuts the cake with comical slowness, trying to get it perfectly divvied. She thinks about sneaking a taste from what comes away on the knife, but resists like a responsible almost-adult. She carefully makes her way to the kitchen so that she can deposit the knife by the sink for a proper scrubbing later.
By the time she returns to the cake, hopefully they are well on their way to being able to consume it. A bit suddenly she says, ]
[ i don't know what flavor cake this is and i'm leaving it up to you
Anyway, they have their cake slices and Dokja is actually eating for once. He's mid-bite when Gray next speaks, and he speeds up his chewing so that he doesn't have to talk with his mouth full. ]
That's definitely older than five, [ he says jokingly, a small smile on his face. ] Congratulations on seventeen. It probably doesn't mean much from me, but you've grown into a really kind person.
[ Which is great because he knows so many teenagers who are just the worst people. ]
[ It gets to be a chocolate cake because they are superior. She savors the first bite, eyes closing with contentment as the rich flavor of the cake settles on her tongue.
She looks over at Dokja curiously when he calls her kind. It's a bit of an odd compliment... but "kind" is better than "cute," so she doesn't try to refute it. ]
[ At seventeen, Dokja was taking regular beatings from both his peers and his relatives, but that doesn't seem to cause him any discomfort as he leans back in his chair, fork stuck in his mouth as he thinks about it. ]
I guess I was a quiet kid?
[ Not that he's very loud now, but he at least talks more. He removes the fork from his mouth as he crosses his arms and tilts his head to one side like he's trying to remember. He'd given away so much of his personal details to the other half of him that he's not sure what he has left. ]
Honestly, it was so long ago that I can barely remember.
[ 29 is probably where he's at... Sometimes you lose track of your age after tens of thousands of years and also wiping out half of your memories. Normal problems. ]
Ah... I'm probably a little older than how I appear.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
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But no, Dokja is definitely the only other person in the vicinity. A lump wells up in her throat without apparent reason, and she looks perhaps alarmingly more devastated than delighted. ]
Mr. Dokja... what is this?
[ As if she can't read the cake perfectly well on her own. ]
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Thankfully, there aren't that many to light. ]
Eustace mentioned your birthday before and he left something for you. [ Nods to the gift bag. ] I thought... it would be strange if I gave it to you without at least a small celebration.
[ When he looks up after lighting the last candle, he finally spots the expression on her face, and his own shifts into one of concern. ]
... Gray?
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She's never put much stock in her birthday. For a long time, it was a countdown to her inevitable death, and it drowned her in attention she desperately wished to avoid. Dokja's version of a birthday party is a lonely and pathetic affair in comparison, the number of candles on the cake not even close to correct, and she wouldn't have it any other way.
Regardless, she begins to cry. She's aware that it's not a very good response to an act intended to make her happy, so she tries to be quiet about it, but the fact sticks out that Eustace isn't here, Add isn't here, the latter having been with her for every birthday twelve years past. It feels wrong to celebrate anything with them gone.
She shakes her head, wipes at her eyes, and forges on valiantly. If she acts like she isn't crying, then maybe they can both pretend it isn't happening and she's just overcome with gratitude. And a small part of her is; this is far more than she would ever ask or expect of Dokja.
She sniffs. ]
I'm not five, Mr. Dokja...
[ She means for it to be a lighthearted comment, but the effect might be lost in light of the waterworks. ]
kills dw for not giving me this notif
And despite living together in this house, they are strangers to each other. The one single tie they had is no longer present, and in this moment, Dokja wishes more than ever that Eustace was here to be the person that Gray needs right now.
But he's not here, as painful a reminder as that is, so Dokja makes do. He's not sure why Gray's crying, but if her comment is anything to go by... ]
Sorry, [ he says hastily as he starts for the kitchen drawers. ] Maybe we have more candles somewhere? Ah, I thought... [ Actually. ] I wasn't really thinking about it?
[ It just seemed like a better idea than guessing wrong and ending up with a one or two candle difference, but maybe teenagers are more sensitive than he'd thought!! He hasn't been a teenager in a while so he wouldn't know. Oh God, the candle wax is starting to melt on the cake.]
I can get more candles if we don't have them.
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N-No. It's okay, you don't have to go that far.
[ She looks up at him with apology in her eyes. ]
I was just taken by surprise. I forgot it was my birthday. So, um... thank you.
[ She's trying to convey genuine gratitude, but again given her gloomy expression, something may be lost in translation.
And still the candles burn... ]
... It's been a long time since anyone gave me a birthday cake, so honestly I'm a little overwhelmed.
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I guess we're more alike than I thought.
[ Considering that he, too, had forgotten his birthday a few months ago and was only made aware of it when his own companions, no longer present now, had thrown him a small celebration. It's embarrassing to think back on, especially because Dokja had practically bawled over it, but he thinks he can understand a little bit of what Gray's feeling in this moment.
He forces a smile on his face as he returns to the cake, sliding it across the table so it can sit closer to Gray. The candles are very quickly becoming nothing but globs of wax at this point. ]
I'll spare you my singing, and besides your gift, there are no more surprises after this, I promise.
[ They can keep it simple... Quiet. ]
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But right, the candles. She doesn't put much stock in superstition, but in this moment she can't say no to the prospect of a free wish, however slim it is. She folds her hands in prayer — a habit she still practices before meals, even though she hasn't believed in God for a long time. She closes her eyes, brow knit in concentration.
It won't be a secret that she's wishing with all her heart that Eustace will miraculously show up on their doorstep in the near future, or at the very least that he's safe wherever he is. Even as the candles become precipitously short, she takes her time to pour her hope into this single wish.
Finally when she feels she's infused a proper amount of birthday power into the cake, she carefully blows the candles out. She's learned that symbolism can contain real magical power, so she can't take the process too lightly. With all that done, she looks to the gift waiting nearby. ]
Shoud I open that now?
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He jerks his head up, then in the direction of the gift bag still sitting by the table, grabbing it to pass it over to Gray. It's heavier than it might appear, with tissue paper hastily shoved inside to mostly obscure its contents.
The gift itself, a knife (because that's a normal gift for a teenage girl), isn't wrapped, but she'll find a folded up letter on top of it, also written by Eustace and will require asking Val what it says. ]
I'll cut the cake in the meantime.
[ Both for an excuse for something to do, and to give Gray some space should she want to read the letter now. Don't mind him as he takes a short trip into the kitchen to grab something to cut the cake with, because it would be kind of fucked up to cut it with Eustace's present. ]
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Gray —
Happy birthday. You've been through a lot, most of it undeserved, but I'm grateful nonetheless you were brought into this world. It isn't much, but I hope this gift helps while Add is still missing.
If you ever need anything, all you need to do is call and I'll be there.
Eustace
She spends another minute looking at the letter and trying not to sniffle before she puts it away and moves on to the present itself. And what she finds is, not very cutely, a wholeass knife. It has a serious-looking curve to it, the blade pitch black in a way that makes her think it came from the earth, not any artificial treatment. It isn't the sort of knife she would have picked out for herself, but Eustace was much more of an expert than she is. So as always, she'll put her trust in him.
She observes it closely and gets the odd sensation that there's something more to it. She takes it in hand, makes it comfortable in her grip, and reaches for that vein of magical energy sticking out of it like wick...
... and then she disappears. She gasps and clutches the knife closer in surprise, and then holds it away again when she feets its unfamiliar length scraping at her clothes. But when she looks at the knife, when she looks down at herself, she sees nothing there at all. For all intents and purposes, she's invisible. ]
Um... Mr. Dokja?
[ Can he see her or is this an Emperor's New Clothes situation... (it isn't) ]
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Dokja isn't paying attention at all while he rummages inside of a drawer, so when he hears his name being called, he hums a distracted response before looking up.
... Uh. ]
Gray?
[ Forget the cake-cutting knife. Dokja takes a couple of steps back into the dining area, then pauses as he glances around with his expression scrunched up in confusion. Hadn't she just been here a second ago? ]
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... I think Mr. Eustace gave me a magic knife.
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He's too old for jumpscares, but he looks in what he hopes is Gray's direction. ]
Geez, the least he could do is mention it would be magic. [ Typical Eustace, keeping too much to himself. ] Invisibility, huh? That's going to have its uses.
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Yes, I think he— ah.
[ She cuts off as Raisin comes over and politely runs her over with his hugeness. In his doggy confusion, he rapidly sticks his nose all over her in a fury of sniffs. Able to smell and hear her but unable to see her, it seems he's making it a mission to suss out her deal. ]
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Down, boy.
[ Poor Raisin is a mass of drool and confused whines, and Dokja's gaze once again wanders in search of Gray's general direction. ]
Are you able to turn it off?
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She pops back into the visible spectrum. She's sitting on the floor with the knife awkwardly held up in her hand and a splatter of dog drool on her. ]
... Yes, it looks like it.
[ She gets up and continues to hold the knife awkwardly because there's no sheath to go along with it and she's trying really hard not to accidentally stab anyone. ]
Um, did you need any help cutting the cake?
[ Because she has the perfect tool now... ]
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Meanwhile, Dokja tilts his head to one side as he considers the knife in Gray's hand. ]
You want to cut it using Eustace's gift?
[ It's not going to turn the cake invisible, is it... ]
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I don't think he'd mind.
[ This is more a function of Eustace being too soft on her than anything; her characterization of him is more than likely a bit skewed. ]
If cake is the only thing this knife has to cut, I'd prefer that too.
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[ It's a little sad, the way Dokja says it, but it's a sentiment he genuinely wishes for but knows will never be the case. But with that said, he gestures back toward the cake on the table. ]
As the birthday girl, you do the honors.
[ He'll go grab some plates! ]
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By the time she returns to the cake, hopefully they are well on their way to being able to consume it. A bit suddenly she says, ]
By the way, I'm seventeen now.
[ She feels old saying it out loud. ]
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Anyway, they have their cake slices and Dokja is actually eating for once. He's mid-bite when Gray next speaks, and he speeds up his chewing so that he doesn't have to talk with his mouth full. ]
That's definitely older than five, [ he says jokingly, a small smile on his face. ] Congratulations on seventeen. It probably doesn't mean much from me, but you've grown into a really kind person.
[ Which is great because he knows so many teenagers who are just the worst people. ]
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She looks over at Dokja curiously when he calls her kind. It's a bit of an odd compliment... but "kind" is better than "cute," so she doesn't try to refute it. ]
You make it sound like I was a mean child.
[ But she smiles, showing no offense taken. ]
Were you very different when you were seventeen?
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I guess I was a quiet kid?
[ Not that he's very loud now, but he at least talks more. He removes the fork from his mouth as he crosses his arms and tilts his head to one side like he's trying to remember. He'd given away so much of his personal details to the other half of him that he's not sure what he has left. ]
Honestly, it was so long ago that I can barely remember.
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[ He looks younger than her 29-year-old mentor. ]
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Ah... I'm probably a little older than how I appear.
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When's your birthday?
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